Fooey on Looey!

By Ed “Peachy” Calhoun
Jewett Babbler
Sports Columnist

Had to drive Cooper all the way up to a vet I know in Corsicana because he got stung by a yellowjacket and his paw swelled up like a water balloon. Don’t ya hate that?

The good news is that between the long haul and the time I spent waiting for Cooper to get his shots, I got to listen to the whole four-hour Rangers game in Boston. I don’t know what the hell happened to my boys. Seems like a week ago we were two or so games out, but that was before them New Englanders ate their atomic beans. Anyway, you know I wouldn’t be filling you in like this unless the game was more than special.

Game of the Day

BOSTON—Us Ranger fans can’t exactly relate to where they’re coming from up there. The Red Sox have been closing their eyes, swinging with one hand and putting half the balls on the turnpike. For nine straight days. Yesterday they even gave Blyleven a big what-for.

This time it’s a couple of real characters having at it, Dock Ellis and Luis Tiant, and Dock seems to need some of that hippie medicine he took a few years back when he threw that no-hitter. He walks Carbo, Fisk and Yaz to start the Boston 1st, before Rice hits into a double dealer and Evans whiffs.

Tiant’s got his full goofy act down, whirling and dervishing and looking up at the half-moon and Dave May takes him out of the park anyway after a Claudell single to put us up 2-1 in the 2nd. Not for long, of course.  With two outs in Boston’s 2nd, Burleson singles and Doyle doubles and Carbo walks and Fisk gets bonked and the Polish fella singles and we’re down again 3-2.

Looey looks even worse than Dock, though. Two doubles two singles, a walk and a sacf fly in the 4th and we’re back up 5-3. What? You think we’re not gonna hold that? You’d be right, podner. Polish Fella hits his 13th homer in the 4th, Evans hits his 16th and eighth in his last seven games in the 6th and we’re losing again 6-5.

But here’s where Boston gets all cocky, because in most cases they’d have their danger-zone bullpen in the game for the late innings. Instead, Tiant stays out there, not being tired I suppose. Well, May rips another tater off him to tie the game in the 8th, and a Hargrove double and Bevacqua triple puts us ahead in the 9th!

Cue Butch Hobson, schooled once by bear Bryant himself, and as hot as everyone else in the lineup. Butchie pops Len Barker’s first 9th inning pitch into the net to tie the game and this Red Sox streak might never end.

But Tiant won’t leave the game, because everything Boston spits out somehow turns into gold nuggets, but after Beniquez singles in the 10th, Bump Wills rides a Tiante dipsy-doodle curveball straight into the bullpen. Barker gets Rice to ground into his second DP to end the nine-game win streak, and this old boy and the American League rejoice. Boston hits the road for a western big ballpark tour after tomorrow’s finale, so I’d look for them to get sort of human again.

TEX 020 300 011 2 – 9 17 0
BOS 120 102 001 0 – 7 14 0

W-Barker L-Cocky Tiant HRS: D, May-2, Wills, Yaz, Evans, Hobson GWRBI-Wills

Other Stuff:

at YANKEES 8-7-0, WHITE SOX 3-9-2
Guidry waits until the 9th to fall apart this time, and by then the Yanks have eight runs in off Doomed Steve Stone. New York back to within four in the loss column.

W-Guidry L-Stone (0-10!) SV-Lyle HRS: Johnson, Chambliss GWRBI-Piniella

ROYALS 9-16-0, INDIANS 2-13-1
After the Eckersley tragedy, Cleveland just gets cremated the way they’re used to being. Hal McRae goes 5-for-5.

W-Colborn L-Garland HR: Thornton GWRBI-LaCock

at ORIOLES 7-9-0, TWINS 1-6-0
Rudy May stops the latest Carew streak at eight and pretty much wipes the field with everyone else. Bumbry with a huge bases-clearing double in the 3rd to turn the game around.

W- May L-Thormodsgard GWRBI-Bumbry

at PIRATES 8-12-1, CARDS 1-12-1
Seems to me we got a discrepancy in regards to how to make use of your hits. A couple of Pittsburgh ones leave the park with people out on the bases watching, always a better idea. Bucs and Cards tied at the top again.

W-Candelaria L-Urrea HRS: Stargell, Parker GWRBI-Stargell

DODGERS 4-11-0, at PHILLIES 3-6-0
Except for the Bake McBride 3-run bomb off him in the 7th that almost costs him the game, Burt Hooton is great!

W-Hooton L-Christenson SV-Hough HRS: Garvey, McBride GWRBI-Cey

at EXPOS 8-10-0, EXPOS 5-5-0
Grand slam in the 9th by Howe makes this one look closer than it was, but Rogers has Houston in a coma until that moment.

W-Rogers L-Pentz HRS: Howe, Unser, Speier GWRBI-Valentine

at REDS 6-9-0, CUBS 0-8-2
The new Cubs lineup designed to prevent their chronic double plays doesn’t exactly work, as they hit into four, but Norman’s expert pitching and the fact that Morgan comes back from an injury (and steals two bases) has a lot to do with it.

W-Norman L-Reuschel HRS: Bench, Driessen

American League through Wednesday, June 11

Boston 35 21 .625
Kansas City 33 24 .579 2.5
New York 30 25 .545 4.5
Baltimore 30 26 .536 5
Texas 29 29 .500 7
Minnesota 26 30 .464 9
Chicago 22 33 .400 12.5
Cleveland 20 37 .351 15.5

National League through Wednesday, June 11

St. Louis 34 24 .586
Pittsburgh 35 25 .583
Los Angeles 31 26 .544 2.5
Philadelphia 30 27 .526 3.5
Cincinnati 30 28 .517 4.5
Houston 26 32 .448 8.5
Montreal 23 32 .418 10
Chicago 21 36 .368 13

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